Showing posts from September, 2010

Wake me up when September ends

It always amazes me how the whole world can turn on a dime. One moment you can be riding the wave, the next you are drowning. The ups and downs, twists and curves of life often leave us exasperated, throwing our hands up in the air and screaming stop the world, I want off.

The last weekend of August marked a much anticipated trip to Mohican. Bethany and I had planned this for so long, our annual camping expedition but with her Doug and my Shaun by our sides, the forst time either had come. We canoed down the Mohican river, made camp food, drank too much, and had an awesome time. It was just an amazing weekend and we didn't want it to end. Little did either of us know how everything was about to change.

Last Saturday, the fourth, I was packing the boys into the car to head to our family reunion in Gallipolis. The phone rang and Bobbi's voice on the other end was one of panic and alarm. She has been going through something for over a year, and that day had gotten very bad news. He…

Whats for you won't pass by you

Through the last 2 years, I have had my fair share of heartache and starting over. I have met some amazing people, swung for the fences and missed and, most of all, learned a lot about myself and the people around me. Through it all, my pillar of support has been Miss Bethany. My arch nemesis when I was in high school, she has become my closest friend over the years. Through the separation, the women, the alcohol, and all the other monumental errors I have made over the past 20 months, she has always been there to voice her concerns, throw her support behind me, lend me an ear or shoulder, and be a true friend. At a time when I have questioned everyone in my life and felt very alone, she made sure I knew I wasn't. I am eternally grateful for that.

To say that Bethany is heartbroken tonight would be like saying the Titanic bumped into an ice cube. More appropriately, I would say that her heart has been shattered into a million tiny pieces that may never be picked up or put back toge…

My brothers keeper

As I sat here with my brother Monday evening I saw a side of him I have never seen before. Josh has always been a rebel, a wildchild, and, in his own words, a jerk. Ok maybe he didn't say jerk, but the blog is PG rated. But on that night I saw a Josh who is hurting badly. Not because of what he is going through with Heather. Not because of anything with Chrystal or the kids. No, Josh is still having as tough a time with the loss of our mother as he did on the day we lost her. He cried as he told me how he feels like he lost the only person in this world who has ever truly understood him. He cried as we recounted her final days. And he wept uncontrollably as he told me of her final breaths. I too shed so many tears because I chose not to be in the room when that happened, and this was the first time I heard about those few moments right before we lost her. I spent the better part of the last 2 days worried about my baby brother, as he tends to disappear for long periods of time. Wi…